Welp, I've mostly been playing the demo of Sun/Moon and sleeping the entire day. Also, I've been catching up on the AOT manga through Youtube videos (not gonna spoil anything but dear luna is the series taking a turn).
Thankfully I've been cleaning up a bit (mostly the kitchen but I'll get to my bedroom soon), but I hate it that my family is so darn pushy about it. Seriously, every time my one aunt comes over (the one who brings us dinner every night) she's like 'I thought you said you would clean up the house a bit' and gets on my nerves about it. I'm trying to actually RELAX as best I can, so feeling pressure from my aunt on getting the apartment cleaned is making it worse.
Also, I'm going to see my mom today, yay~ ^^
Reason I didn't see her before is because she was getting angry that she couldn't talk well to anyone and kept on taking the mask off, so they put tubes down her throat and now she can't talk at all. The reason for no visits is because she might've tried to take the tubes out to talk, and if that happened they'd have to do a tracheotomy(?) which would be highly irreversible. I think she'll be fine today, but even if she can't talk then it'll be fine. I'm just glad she'll be ok...she even got her medicaid back, but since I don't have a job or make any money I'm not included in that. Which is completely fine, I'm glad she can get her medicine and we don't have to worry about medical bills.
I'm also worried about if my 3DS will be able to even play Sun/Moon with the current SD card it has. I mean, it's speculated the game is 32-37 GB so I'll definitely need another SD card. I just don't know if we'll have enough to get one, and if we don't, then I guess I can ask my aunt to pay for one for me and say it'll be counted as part of repaying me for letting her borrow so much money before.
And my other aunt is still like 'oh are you worried about the games still? shouldn't you worry about the bills and your mom more?'. Of course I am, but my mom plans to buy the games for us and I want to make sure that happens. At least I'll be able to do that, I've felt really useless lately and have been crying on and off the entire week. Plus due to my period I've become so physically weak that I get easily dizzy from even standing. I feel like I'm turning into my mom, and not in a good way.
I still need to talk to my aunt about the games and such soon, but I haven't seen her in awhile. Maybe I'll talk to her about it today...
Also, turns out I might have anxiety! I know people with depression usually have it, but it's so bad that it's caused me to fear going outside by myself and whenever anyone tells me that I can do something I fear that I won't 'measure up' to their expectations at all so I completely shut down. I talked to my grandma's helper about it, and even she suspects I might have it. If I do have it, then I guess I'll have to welcome in another Other to the group. <_< But I'm not sure yet...ugh, I hate going to the doctor. I get paranoid just thinking about it. But I have to, otherwise Re-Sempai will tell me I can't have another Other unless I get diagnosed with it.
But turns out, my mom has anxiety as well. So that means I was born with ADD, Clinical Depression, and Anxiety(?). I mean, it does make sense that it would pass on to me from my mom. I'm not blaming her, I'm just saying that those kinds of things can be passed onto the next generation and I wish I had gotten the help I needed sooner so I can better deal with all this. But I can't change the past, so I'm not gonna get upset anymore over it.
Anyways! So...how have y'all been doing? ^^ I'm genuinely curious.